Nicola Twilley on experiencing the scent of an endangered flower that blooms for only a few hours, just after dawn, on one day every year:
“Bursts of flavor combined with short inhales of the scent to make the experience even more ephemeral than I had anticipated. It was there for a tiny, magical second, and then it was gone before I could really appreciate it—not unlike the flower it came from.”
Photograph courtesy Miriam Simun
1. Date a boy who makes you happy, but marry him only if he makes you laugh deep-belly rumbles that hurt your ribs as they expand outwards. Date him when he sees that you’re hurting and he gives you a moment to feel that pain like a handprint spreading across your consciousness, marry him only if he can make you smile even while you’re gross sobbing. The world is not a kind place. You will feel a lot of pain. Make sure you are with someone who makes it all bearable. Humor is an excellent gauge of intelligence. Life gets boring. Find someone who makes the banal interesting.
2. Make sure he has scars on the back of his hands, it’s a good sign he has experience either fighting or making things - creation is an act of selflessness and bruised knuckles are a good sign he knows how to defend himself. You’ve got too much soul to be handled by someone who has never been passionate. If he’s never thrown a punch, let him at least have tasted the insanity of bringing an idea into existence. Rough palms are better than soft ones, they have been salted by this earth and made into leather. Callouses are evidence he has lived, that he has broken skin and been in pain over and over and over again and still came back to the source of it. People rub against each other. Don’t marry him if he can’t handle even a little blister.
3. Before you say yes, get him angry. See him scared, see him wanting,see him sick. Stress changes a person. Find out if he drinks and if he does, get him drunk - you’ll learn more about his sober thoughts. Discover his addictions. See if he puts you in front of them. You can’t change people, baby girl. If they are made one way, it doesn’t just wear off. If you hate how he acts when he’s out of it now, you’re going to hate it much worse eight years down the road. You might love him to bits but it doesn’t change that some people just don’t fit.
4. Trust your instincts. If he ever makes you feel unsafe, don’t make excuses, just get up and leave. That’s all there is to it. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
5. If he puts money before you, he’ll keep pushing you to the bottom of the pile until you become his last priority. It’s one thing if he can’t afford what you want, it’s another if he has the cash but won’t spring for a box of chicken mcnuggets. Money and love are arch enemies. 62% of divorces occur due to economic strain. Make sure keeping you is more important than his 401k.
6. How a man treats animals is a good indicator of how he treats children. If you see him raise a hand to a dog, pack your things into a little black bag. Animals at their worst are only half as annoying as a toddler on their best behaviour. Your kids will be beautiful, but they will also misbehave. Same goes for waiters and hotel maids - if he’s rude to those who are working for minimum wage, it says a lot about how he sees himself. Patience is rare and so important. If he’s not forgiving to a dog, he’s not good for your kids.
7. If he isn’t in awe of you, he doesn’t deserve you. You are my little girl and you were born perfect. If he can’t see that, it’s his loss. There is someone who thinks your flaws power his heart. Be strong. If he asks you to change, be like like rock of your birthstone, do not waver. You are wondrous just the way that you are.” —My father’s recipe for the man I should marry (part 1/2 of a series). /// r.i.d (via fearlessknightsandfairytales)
The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:
Aries: You might feel a little distant from your own life this week, like you’re far from home even when you’re in your own kitchen, in your own bed, in the most familiar corners of your thoughts. This week might feel strange, but if you keep your eyes open you’ll be able to find a beautiful bright clarity. You’ll be able to know what you want. You’ll be able to see what you need to do. You’ll be able to come back to earth when you’re ready, but for now just focus on breathing in this cold clean air.
Taurus: This is a week for cleaning bad feelings out of your house, for clearing bad feelings out of your body. There are so many ways to keep living. There are so many ways to get free, and there are so many kinds of strange joy that you can let into your heart, and it’s okay to quit things that make you sad, sometimes. It’s okay to walk away. It’s okay to talk and talk and talk until your secrets turn into air. Drink water or go on the longest walks or cook something beautiful just for yourself.
Gemini: The world around you might not fully make sense this week, and this is okay. The world around you might feel tangled and bendy and wild, but it will be filled with the glimmer of possibility. It will be filled with the thrill of the future. Your days will come into focus slowly, and the truths you are looking for will reveal themselves to you when you don’t even expect it. Your life might not make sense, but you have what you need to keep moving. Listen to songs you don’t understand. Listen to songs about love.
Cancer: This is a week for talking, it’s a week for making so much bright golden noise, it’s a week not to hold back. This is a week for saying things that might embarrass you, as long as you speak with a full heart. This is a week for saying things that might make your life strange, a week for saying things that might make your life better, a week for saying what’s been on your mind. Write letters, write long funny emails, stay up late at night on the phone. Talk about your secrets. Talk about your love.
Leo: The world might feel slow this week, and you might feel stuck. It might feel like there’s nowhere to move, like there’s not enough air, but still there are so many ways to make space for yourself. There are so many places to find movement, even on the slowest and weirdest days. It’s a week for reading, it’s a week for telling stories, it’s a week for turning up the music loud enough that you can feel it in your bones, wild enough that you can hear it in your dreams.
Virgo: This week, your dreams might feel heavy with meaning, and your days might shine with truth, and you can see your face reflected back to you in windows and mirrors; you can see your own life reflected back to you in the sky, in the morning, in the eyes of the people you know. It’s a week for finding small moments of quiet for yourself, a week for building slow peaceful days, a week for sitting back and letting your mind wander and watching the golden afternoon light. It’s a week for remembering who you are.
Libra: This week, you can feel something inside you fit into place, you can feel your life start to make sense to you again. This week, you can believe in the rhythms that beat in your dreams, you can believe in the love pumping in your heart, you can believe in the things that you feel in your bones to be true. Let the world fill you with a sense of wholeness. You’re made of blood and bone and water and dreams and you don’t have to try to be anybody but your own sweet self.
Scorpio: This week, if you pay attention, you might feel your body in moving in some kind of funny rhythm with the world. You might feel your thoughts moving in harmony with the life you’ve built for yourself. You might a stillness, or a sweetness, or a funny feeling of peace. It’s a week to let the world move you. It’s a week to sit back in awe at all the wild days that have brought you here. It’s a week to drink coffee, to be good to your friends, to watch the world spin, to wait and see.
Sagittarius: This week might feel strange, it might feel frustrating, it might make you so impatient. This week might feel like nothing is quite settled, like nothing is quite what you’re expecting it to be. Sometimes it takes such a long time for the patterns of your life to make themselves known. Sometimes the way forward is clear, and sometimes you just have to be patient, sometimes you have to do the best you can while you wait. Try to be kind. Try to keep moving. Try to trust that the message will become clear.
Capricorn: This is a week for learning new ways not to back down when the world gets strange. This is a week for learning new ways to create your own light, to create your own energy, to create your own fire. It’s a week for moving, it’s a week for sweating, it’s a week for shouting and singing and cooking and eating. Fill yourself up with stories of people who are brave enough to keep living. Listen to music that makes you believe in your own body, your own strength, your own life.
Aquarius: The skies might feel heavy above you this week, the ground might feel hard, the streets might feel crowded and close. The world might try to shrink your imagination, or your belief in your own bright magic, or your wild love for the people around you. This is a week for staying bright and generous even in a difficult world. This is a week for resistance, it’s a week for pushing back, it’s a week for staying strong and strange in the face of all the forces that would have you feel small.
Pisces: This week, follow the rhythm of the earth as it spins under your feet. Follow the rhythm of songs played in supermarkets, in cars, in your head. Follow the thoughts that won’t leave you alone. Follow the images that keep tugging at you, keep speaking to you, keep bothering you. Follow the things that move you, even if they don’t make sense yet, even if you aren’t sure where they’re taking you. It’s not your job right now to know why. All you have to do is honor your own instincts.
Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May